Lessons for my future sons (Part Three)
Posted by: carlotess on: October 12, 2010
This is going to go on for another week so fasten your seatbelts.
21. Reproach none for the infirmities of nature, nor delight to put them that have in mind thereof.
Laughing at the handicapped is not how I raised you. You know that God made each and every one special so don’t point out others’ disabilities or infirmities. Don’t even smirk to yourself, it could have happened to you.
22. Show not yourself glad at the misfortune of another though he were your enemy.
You know the Bible teaches us to love even our enemies so treat them with love at all times. No matter how badly you feel about someone, it’s not fair to laugh or joy at their misfortune. Misfortune can befall anyone and you don’t want to end up being the one laughed at.
23. When you see a crime punished, you may be inwardly pleased; but always show pity to the suffering offender.
In other words, don’t be the one running to lynch a thief caught in the act. You may alert someone to the crime, but feel sorry for him because whatever the mob will do to him is not worth his crime. I don’t know if you’ll be lawyers or police officers but keep this in mind if you choose to be either.
24. Do not laugh too loud or too much at any publick spectacle.
Be mindful of others’ embarrassment or shame and don’t mock them. If something bad is happening publicly, do not be a part of it. This includes bullying at school. You must never be part of the children picking on another because you are a gentleman and gentlemen behave themselves wisely.
25. Superfluous compliments and all affectation of ceremonie are to be avoided, yet where due they are not to be neglected.
Gushing is unnecessary and just makes you seem too eager. A compliment in season is more than enough to voice your opinion. You may however show joy when something good has befallen a friend but don’t overdo it.
26. In pulling off your hat to persons of distinction, as noblemen, justices, churchmen etc. make a reverence, bowing more or less according to the customof the better bred, and quality of the person. Amongst your equals expect not always that they should begin with you first, but to pull off the hat when there is no need is affectation, in the manner of saluting and resaluting in words keep to the most usual custom.
I’m going to have to buy you hats and teach you how to bow to people of stature so that this rule may apply in your life. Bottom line, be respectful.
27. ’Tis ill manners to bid one more eminent than yourself be covered as well as not to do it to whom it’s due likewise; he that makes too much haste to put on his hat does not well, yet he ought to put it on at the first, or at most the second time of being ask’d; now what is herein spoken, of qualification in behavior in saluting,ought also to be observed in taking of place, and sitting down for ceremonies without bounds is troublesome.
Don’t hint for people to leave when they’ve come to visit, or offer them their coat. Especially when they are older than you or important people. On the other hand, if someone offers you your coat and asks you to leave, don’t dilly dally. Honour the host and be on your way. The same applies to if they’ve invited you to eat, or to any function.
28. If any one come to speak to you while you are sitting stand up tho’ he be your inferior, and when you present seats let it be to every one according to his degree.
I like this rule very much because it distinguishes even the most respectful of men. Don’t you ever stay seated when someone comes to greet you, even if you’re just at a coffee shop. Stand up and show them that you were raised right. When it comes to ladies, stand up when they are going to sit and offer to pull their chair for them, stand up when they are leaving the table and hold the door for them.
29. When you meet with one of greater quality than yourself, stop, and retire especially if it be at a door or any straight place to give way for him to pass.
Squeezing yourself in a corridor with an older person is unseemly. Let them go through first and then follow. The same applies to someone who you think might be of more importance than you, no matter how much you despise them. I need not say that this rule applies to all ladies at all times.
30. In walking, the highest place in most countrys seems to be on the right hand; therefore place yourself on the left of him whom you desire to honor: but if three walk together the middest place is the most honorable; the wall is usually given to the most worthy if two walk together.
I don’t need to add anything here. Business dealings will go way smoother for you if you treat others with this level of respect, even if you feel they do not deserve this respect. You catch more bees with honey than with vinegar.
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Yours Truly
My way of giving the glory back to God through writing. It's not all religion but it's always glorifying Him.
